Age has never bothered me, I can’t think of a single number that has come and gone that arrived with any dread. 18, 21, 30 and even 40 all passed without any real fuss on my part. I had celebrations for them of course but I wasn’t one for worrying about the rising digits.
With the coming of yet another 40 number there is the inevitable questioning from work colleagues about the veracity of my age claims. Thankfully this year it falls on a Sunday so the actual proportion of the diatribe will be greatly reduced, Facebook aside, that is.
I am liking that the gift of these last two years has been one of greater contentment. Who would have ever guessed that it would take the breakdown of sanity to bring me to my senses.
I recently watched a movie called Demolition, this had nothing at all to do with the construction industry. It involved the steady descent of a man who lost his wife and went through a process of deconstructing pretty much his whole life. Unsurprisingly I could relate to his mental state.
His father in law had said to him that he would probably need to take his life apart and rebuild it, he never quite got around to last bit before the end of the movie.
It is my earnest hope that I do achieve this in the time left to me.
I think that I may be coping with this ageing thing. I packed my son off early this morning on a hiking trip and after lunch the two females departed on a shopping trip leaving me in silence. With only a couple of tasks to accomplish I wandered into the coffee shop for a relaxing hour. Coffee arrived with only several silent hand gestures across the room.
The day before my birthday as a child was one of massive excitement and anticipation, I always had a huge list of things that I wanted and would eagerly wait to see what arrived. Today I am an nightmare, like most men of my age there are few things of affordable price that I would desire.
This creates huge problems for the kindly friends and family who want to purchase a something. Being content with what we have is great for us, not so great for others at such times.
As Saturdays go this has been a tremendously relaxed and relaxing one. I have been absolved of my usual weekend cooking duties tomorrow and don’t have the first clue what is for any of the meals. There has been a lot of hushed conversation going on this week and I was banished outside last night for a few hours, not that I minded.
So while it would be nice to have a little of the childhood enthusiasm and excitement about tomorrow I think that I prefer this. All of that angst and worry about my life before I was married is long gone.
Clearing the father’s day cards from the fireplace today was long overdue, but tomorrow they will be replaced with new cards and while I might not be too enthusiastic at the best of times the deep joy and appreciation of having people who plan on my behalf is a greater gift than can be wrapped.
That said, I do like a parcel.