Dazed

PalitoyoriginalTinyTears1960s

There is nothing like a smoke alarm at 4:40 am.

Actually there is, but I will come back to that.

Being suddenly roused from that deepest of sleeps is always a shocker. We are convinced that there is a silent war of attrition going on against our slumber time. Since returning to work I haven’t had a full night of sleep, ok it’s only been three nights, but come on already.

I remember with great fondness the pre 40 times when waking in the night time was unknown. We slept soundly from head down to alarm song in the early morning in those halcyon days where being unconscious was an expectation.

In our childhood days there was a baby doll who was called ‘Tiny tears,’ my sister was carer to one and had quite a job protecting it from me. One of the features of this plastic baby was that when reclined it’s eyes would click shut. There was some kind of counter balance thing going on and those big blue eyes with their huge eyelashes closed with an unmistakable click.

Not long after our marriage my wife christened me ‘Tiny tears,’ she had never experienced someone who could fall asleep so directly and immediately upon reclining bed. I often fell asleep mid story but possessed an uncanny knack of recalling the last few sentences like some trailed off recording. My greatest moment was, one night, falling asleep while talking myself, I actually bored myself to sleep!

Standing this morning gazing up at the screaming alarm I was aware of my great responsibility. My wife and daughter were looking at me expectantly to silence this screeching beast of the night. My son was lost in dreamland and has yet to surface. I envy his ability that I too once possessed.

Sleeping alone in the bedroom of my parents house in my late teens I was like a corpse. One morning I came through to make breakfast and couldn’t open the living room door, my first thought was the ‘stupid cat’ had pulled back the carpet again. This proved not be the case as it was the couch blocking the door and not even that cat could have achieved this. Turned out I had survived a burglary, they took one look at the slumbering ogre and quickly beat a retreat.

Snapping quickly into cohesion after a rude awakening isn’t always easy, as the others retreated back to bed I was left wondering how to silence this noise. Unplugging it seemed the most logically achievable option given the hour, so boots on and ladder scaled, job done.

On the way back to bed I restored the picture frame that had been dislodged in my haste to turn on the lights in the rush to the (thankfully) non existent fire.

So after lying awake wedged in beside the comfiest of companions for over an hour I fell into the deepest of sleeps.

It’s funny how your subconscious is aware of the time.

The heating usually clicks on as I am leaving the house, but today it was early, actually I was late. It turns out that a smoke alarm sounds exactly like an alarm clock to a sleeping person, well this one at least. So, while not broken, my stubbed toe is, nevertheless, throbbing from making contact with the ship’s chest in the hall, when they ‘touched base’ in the ensuing rush.

Any one of these things in previous times would have been a cause of massive irritation for me, but I must be learning because I am not upset in any way. Tired yes, upset no.

We always have a choice, let the blood pressure rise or roll with it. The punches won’t ever stop coming but we can defend and work out a strategy for solving and moving on.

 

 

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