Honestly?

How-can-we-determine-the-others-to-be-honestI find myself saying this word involuntarily on too many occasions.

The problem isn’t that I am surrounded by professional liars, it’s just something that has crept into my speech when people are relaying a story or something equally mundane about their lives.

I have spent time working with individuals and indeed whole departments of businesses where lying was an integral part of their daily structure. Having gone through the training programme and assimilated all of the required information to proceed I was let loose on the unsuspecting public. The first few weeks went great and my sales were incredibly prodigious, I was the toast of the office.

Then something happened.

I began to investigate things for myself in order to further improve my information base; what I had been trotting out as sound facts were actually blatant lies. The whole shing bang was built on a foundation of fabrication; promises that I had made in good faith were ignored, as was I  when questioning them. The really sad part was that the product was exceptional, it would have sold anyway had all the areas of the business fulfilled their expectations.

But this isn’t a personal history lesson.

Over the years I have been very blessed to have a wife who has pointed out to me when I am ‘falling into fiction’ (as Sharlene Spitteri from the band Texas put it).

As I stated previously I was a prodigious liar as  child and young adult and although this was dramatically curtailed by an epiphany moment in my teens, the one area where it weedles its way back in is in my head.

And you are no different!

There are certain aspects of our characters that we allow to go unchecked and unrestrained; we pretend that it is genetic or make some other fantastical excuse for the fact that we give them leave to remain. There are as many different names to this as there are people, but the fact remains that we lie continually to ourselves.

We go through life allowing people to wipe their feet not only on our doormat, but to then continue in and leave mud on our rugs, carpets and bedroom furniture. The most intimate places that should be kept sacred in our minds are besmirched with the rotten opinions of others; we then compound the issue by letting these thoughts lie there. Every day the mud just lies there on the rug, on the bed sheets, and we leave it so long that it is so much harder to remove.

It’s time to clean house!

I am aware that it isn’t spring in the Northern Hemisphere but get on with it. Those lies that you have listened to your whole life from teachers parents, genius teenage peers; get the rubber gloves on and root them out.

My own personal favourites resurface when I am over tired or run down. Generally speaking the opinions of others don’t rock my boat when I am healthy and well slept; I fought and won that battle many years ago. The problem arises when I get tired and perspective diminishes. This is a battle that I am still fighting, but recognising your enemy and it’s strength is half the battle.

The other half is being honest enough with ourselves to face it in the first place.

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