The gangster in my pocket
In late August it was time to get my new phone; it has become something of an obligation in recent years. I don’t really like what has happened with this situation because I grow rather attached to my mobile office/camera/entertainment centre in the 24 months that I spend with them.
It is usually two months before my contract expires that I discover some exciting feature that I never knew was even there. This time around was different; the delicate slimness of the device had successfully survived my ill treatment without cracking or majorly malfunctioning, almost everything still performed as expected apart from the call feature.
This is still quite important in a phone!
My son inherited the phone and doesn’t ever answer it anyway, so it isn’t a high priority for him.
On a side rant, when I was growing up if you made an arrangement it was either by letter, phone call or in person; that arrangement stood firm without several more phone calls to check it was still OK, 95% of people stuck to arrangements. Today I have dozens of ways to contact people and yet make next to no calls, arrangements are made and then confirmed several times just to be sure. I think we need a campaign to restore punctuality and integrity.
Anyway, my new acquisition arrived and all important details were successfully synced over. As soon as I had deleted the information from my old phone my new one decided to edit my contacts; it independently came to the conclusion that there were around 100 people that I no longer needed in my life. It turns out it was partly correct, still that wasn’t very helpful when requiring other essential numbers.
The Korean manufacturer has helpfully pre installed several exciting features on this shiny smart phone for my comfort and enjoyment. The one that caught my eye early on was a pedometer cum personal trainer with medical knowledge thrown in for good measure. I can hold my finger on the sensor and find out if I am stressed or my heart rate is too high; it records blood pressure and if desired will track my food intake and sleep patterns while also monitoring my weight.
As I had been consciously trying to trim some fat from the joint anyway this was a welcome development; how convenient to have it all right there in my pocket.
Yeah, that didn’t last!
What began as a daily congratulatory message and virtual pat on the back soon turned into a motivational mafioso, I don’t need a cousin Vinnny on my person. This 5 inch wafer took control of my health and I listened to it; it exercised an authority over my steps, my heart rate, my stress levels. It told me when I was a good boy and chided me when I hadn’t walked enough.
Two weeks ago I disabled the app permanently.
My belt buckle has three settings, none of these send me texts but the message is clear enough.
I am all for motivation from wherever, but the moment that it takes control over my own will it is revolution time.
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