Walking away

A few years ago one of our local football teams was going through a severe financial crisis because of some dodgy dealings by the directors. The press were speculatively commenting that the team manager was about to quit.

This man was a team man through and through, he had played for and loved this team since his youth. Sitting at a press conference he uttered one of those phrases that has now become legendary, it adorns the shirts of the fans and has come to symbolise a fighting Spirit that they want to be known for.

Faced with this extreme criticism and accusation he distanced himself from the boardroom and aligned himself with the fans by stating,

“We don’t do walking away.”

It secured his already strong place in the club’s history, he has since been sacked, but his words will remain there long after him.

There is a clear precedent that is often repeated about the need for tenacity in the face of defeat. A thousand stories, real and fictional, are repeated to encourage us not to quit when the going gets tough. It would be a fair assessment of our generation that we give up way too easily.

The generation that are entering adulthood are even worse, there are very few who would put themselves out, far less answer a life and death call. Thankfully there are still those who have principles and convictions that they are willing to stand by.

A various key points of our married life we have been required to make large decisions, sometimes it has been financial or generally life changing with far reaching consequences. It usually at these moments when we are seriously pondering our next move, that with almost comic timing, Kenny Rogers will appear.

Not in person obviously,  but his song, ‘The gambler’ will begin to play somewhere.

We were sitting just such a situation, about to sign a very important legal document when we heard a busker 3 floors down on the street singing this song. It is uncanny, it will be on the radio or in a shop when we are in the throes of deciding that these words will drift into our ears. It isn’t even just me it happens to, it always both of us.

While I agree wholeheartedly with our football manager friend that when it comes to marriage, family, convictions and core things that walking away is not a good option. There are times when Mr Rogers is correct:

‘You got to know when to hold em                     Know when to fold em                                         Know when to walk away                                   Know when to run’

There have been times that I have stayed with friends too long, stayed in toxic churches out of commitment, hung on to habits in my life that were harmful, when I should have run far away from them.

I have allowed poisonous thought processes to take root in my mind, I have let bad attitudes follow me around. I have continued in actions that were harmful to me and others for way too long.

We can blame everybody and everything around us forever, but it is ultimately me that needs to get to the point of walking away from the things that are damaging.

It is a lot more difficult when that is inside of your head, I know this only too well, but that too can be overcome if you are determined enough to get the help that you need.

Walk away!